There is nothing worse than people who pity themselves. Now I don’t mean one can’t cry over a sore toe, a crushed ego or a broken heart, but seriously, those manically depressed individuals who think that they are alone in the world, that they are more ugly than anyone else, and that nothing they do is ever good enough.... can just grow the fuck up and chuck that sense of self loathing!
I get that depression can often be a chemical imbalance in the brain and cannot be helped without the use of anti-depressants, but PLEASE for the love of god, if you are going to waste away in self pity, suffer alone! Yes, it is even worse when you have a problem with yourself and feel the need to get everyone around you involved too.
“Does my ass look big in these?”
No, no really you look great, if you are worried, maybe try a bigger size?
“Oh so it does look big then, it’s too tight and that means I’ve gained weight..... (Not that I ever do anything about it)”
-no, man fuck! You look good; I was just saying that, if it bothers you...
“So first you said I look great, now it’s just good. I knew you thought I looked fat”
Ah! Please, are you crazy! You look fucking HOT!
“Ok now you are just patronising me! If you really thought that, you would have said it in the first place...”
SHUT THE FUCK UP BITCH! Can you see how exhausting it is when you are around someone who needs constant reassurance!? And the thing that sucks is that generally people like this have a very sharp sense of humour and are incredibly witty (I mean there has to be some reason why they would have friends) Well their sense of humour which often makes use of sarcasm is due to the fact that they are constantly putting themselves down in their own minds and therefore probably have really good come- backs if they ever had to be involved in a ripping-off battle.
Another characteristic about these types is that they are so obsessed with comparing themselves to other people, to make sure that they fit the criteria of “normal” that every other endeavour in their lives becomes unproductive. Granted, these people often have already found their niche’ in life (because they analyse their own person so fucking much) and generally they excel in this, but it’s the only thing they can accomplish! They struggle to master the basic things in life like; keeping friends or knowing what is appropriate to say in a conversation or meeting new people (they choose to only surround themselves with long term friends and people who know them really well) and this is just fucking pathetic.
Try to see the world in terms of its bigger scheme; in fact just try to see the world. Get out of that enclosed, self-critical view that you have and open up your mind as to what is more important in life. It boils down to priorities and perception. Your average life, and your average looks are fucking average, and if it makes you feel better, “average” is like ‘standard’ or NORMAL. Stop making up problems, there are none, if you want to be a rebel, junky from a broken home and an abusive mother- then write a damn book, and you can live through your character. But for now, try and see how great your life is, and how much worse other people have it. I know you have probably heard this a thousand times before, but its true THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS PERFECT!!!!!
You are wasting your life feeling like you’re odd and that people are watching you wherever you go, Wasting your life looking into every mirror or shop window that you pass, just to see your own reflection and to judge yourself, fucking wasting your life when you don’t want people to stare for too long – cause it might cause an awkward moment. There is far too much damage and dirt in this world for you to waste your life on something that exists only in your mind. The only one who is critical, judgemental, obnoxious and sad, is you! And if you do have a very unfortunate background that made you this way, I promise you that there is always someone who is worse off, always!
You need to stand proud, look at yourself in a different light and soon other will see you differently too. The secret is that when you think people are gazing at your imperfections and taking note of them critically, actually, the only thing they are looking at is the way you hate yourself so much. Yes, people can see it and they don’t understand why. Confidence can turn you into a pro-active, self- loving, contributing human being, instead of a miserable sod! No one is going to run up to you and scream “you’re beautiful and I love you!” so say it too yourself! When you can admit that to yourself, you can be free and approachable. Only then will love and admiration find you.
Queen <3
Queen <3
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